Harri Mutka and the Harm of NPD

 "She said I was too feminine and was a homosexual."

"She said she wished I would get a terminal sexual disease."

"She came into the bedroom with a long, sharp knife, ready to stab me. "

These are the tales of Harri Mutka when he speaks of his ex-wife (one of his many partners). 

Harri Mutka, a covert narcissist, plays the victim well. Yet when asked what he does to women, why women react like that to him, he goes silent. Stonewalling all questions into a dead silence. 

People who suffer from NPD struggle with self-esteem and interpersonal relationships. Harri Mutka is a champion in disguising that. He will love bomb the new supply/replacement, feeling temporarily satisfied with his new replacement, happily showing off the new replacement. 

However, NPD is deeply ingrained in him - and his behaviour does not change. With time, his narcissistic traits will show up: lying, gaslighting, dishing out the silent treatment, retreating and denying human affection and communication. Once a woman is of no use to him, he will discard her brutally, as she no longer is considered even as a human being. 

It his last ex partner that he most used, abused and trashed. A woman who shared 50% of  expenses with him, who was honest, hard working and made a home like he never had. Yet it was this person that he was the most brutal to, the most cowardly, not even able to give closure. Because there often is no closure with narcissists. 

Narcissists may keep up the love bombing phase for a while,  remain in a resting period for a while, but their true nature is there. They will constantly have women on the side, constantly lie and blame the other for imagined offences. The other is merely an object for their self validation and nothing more. Narcissists may like the idea of being in love but their "love" is only an infatuation and usually a short term infatuation as they get bored easily and are not able to build long, lasting relationships. 

It's all illusions and facades with a narcissist. Only their lies come in consistent waves; so many lies that Harri Mutka is unable to keep up with his own lies. As a partner, you are only "feed" for a narcissist's self validation and their mask of being a decent human being will slip with time. 

Until the final discard moment which becomes more vicious and nastier with age - or so Harri Mutka has shown. As sure as rain, the moment will come when, faster than a flip of a switch, the partner will be discarded as a non human being, and he will do everything possible to harm, hurt and violate the person who was his partner and had made a home for him and his children. 

Harri Mutka - Narcissistic Abuse

 

First girlfriend slept with his best friend. 

First long term relationship was only because she came from a happy family but he was unable to make her happy. 

Then he went into another relationship, had two more children but could never be faithful to her. 

"When I want a woman, I will stop at nothing to have her" so he always says. 

Taking into account the pain he inflicts on his partners does not matter for Harri Mutka. His lies remain as glaring as his actions. 

Then he married a woman who used him as an ATM machine. Ignored him mostly and would not even cook for his children. He supported her and her two daughters. It came to the point when this wife entered the bedroom with a long, sharp kitchen knife to end him. he then found an apartment for her and her two daughters. 

If you ask him why this happened - after all, the wife had a good life - Harri Mutka goes silent. 

Because he cannot live on his own without a woman, there was another woman. A woman who gave up everything for him. A woman who was understanding, contributed 50% to everything, made a home, excused him for all his short comings. A woman who was dedicated to him, who supported him and loved him. 

That too was not enough for Harri Mutka. He had to lie, gaslight, give her the silent treatment as punishment for existing.When she was ill, at her most vulnerable, he made her even more ill. He lied to her until he had secured a new replacement and even then it was with a text message in the middle of the night. Too cowardly to even be honest about that. 

Yet, if you ask Harri Mutka about these women (never mind all the other in between women), he will always call them crazy and unbalanced. 

As an architect, as someone who is intelligent, this begs the question - how can all these women be crazy and unbalanced? Why does he go silent and refuses to have any responsibility to what he does to women? 

"I am a lone wolf" so he claims. 

No. Harri Mutka is no lone wolf. He is addicted to having new women on a constant basis. 

Today he is with a female narcissist who preys for older, married men on FB and IG, who grooms them until they leave their families. Today, he pays for this gold digger and homewrecker . 

Harri Mutka the #Narcissist in Tampere

 

After years of being supported and cared for...

After years of sharing expenses, dreams, travels, a life....

After years of having had a home like no other....

The narcissist will no longer be able to control his addictions to having new women. The resting phase is over. 

Harri Mutka has used and abuse women for years (he is almost 60 now). However, it was to his last partner that he unleashed all his narcissistic evil and hatred towards women - to the point of bullying and threatening out of her own home. 

He may be addicted to women and lying, but there is also a hidden hatred towards anyone who is creative, anyone who has light and life inside them. He will pretend, use and abuse until he secures a new supply - currently with a woman who lies and who picked him up on FB and IG , and boasts about what she did. 

Narcissistic abuse can never be normalised. 

Harri Mutka and His Ways of Deception

 

They stood by the river. 

"This is where my wife threw her wedding ring into the river" he said. 

What drives a woman to do such a thing? On a trip that a husband pays for? (as he paid for all his wife's trips). 

If you ask Harri Mutka, he will go silent. All explanations remain unspoken. He is always the victim, he is always misunderstood. 

Yet he never had as good as when with his last partner. He often said that he finally had a home which he never had before - clean, warm, organised closet, great food, generosity to all who came (despite being very few who he allowed to come).  He ensured that his partner lived under a bell jar as much as possible - even though he would often say how she was the light and life of the home and family. 

Isolating women suits Harri Mutka. The slightest interaction with another male will make him hold a grudge, go swiftly into jealousy mode. Projecting his own behaviour to others - because Harri Mutka does not know how to live without having women on the side. 

Always being the victim of women, he now pays for yet another gold digger - a Beatriz Grimaldi who claims to be an artist. Life is good when someone else is paying for trips to Venice, Palermo and so many other places. Life is sweet when you do not pay the bills, do not care or look after someone else's children. 

Harri Mutka had it all - a partner who looked up to him, trust him and would have done anything for him. A beautiful, unique home. A lifestyle which many would envy as his partner paid 50% of everything, always supporting him and encouraging him. 

Not enough though for him. His habits of deceit could not be ignored. 

From claiming that he could not "breathe" in Finland, to pretending to be a seasoned expat, Harri Mutka knows no limit in harming women, especially women who are good to him. From lack of empathy towards others, feeding off others' positive energy, gaslighting and delivering the silent treatment on a constant basis, Harri Mutka has indeed accomplished all the traits of a covert narcissist. 

Taking away the family home from his partner (who owns 50%) was his most vicious act - in the midst of a viral pandemic, he made her homeless. All to satisfy his new gold digger in Bologna. 

Harri Mutka - And #Narcissism

 

"When I want a woman, I will stop at nothing to have her".... so says Harri Mutka. 

Yet, if you ask him what he has done to women, you probably will hear:

"She said I was a bad lover" (followed by tears)

"She said I was not a real man, but a homosexual" (more tears follow).

That was the woman who he had married and had said to him. 

His previous partner, the mother of his two children in Tampere can barely say his name without spitting out venom and hatred. If you ask him why, if you ask him how such a lovely person can become so full of disgust when saying his name, he will shrug and call her mad, unbalanced. 

Mad. Unbalanced. All his women seem to have this characteristic after a while. 

Does Harri Mutka have any responsibility of making women mad? Of making women unbalanced?

Could it be his tendency to lie, to gaslight, to withdraw attention and affection, to deliver the silent treatment as punishment? Could it be his mania of spending time with other women on his mobile? Waking up, going to the washroom with his mobile? Hiding every text message and making up excuses and lies for why he is texting every night always at the same time?

Could it be his tendency to have jealousy attacks when there is absolutely no reason for any jealousy? 

This is what a narcissist looks like. This is how a narcissist behaves. He will isolate, lie, and project his behaviour to others, in particular, to the woman closest to him. 

He will go off to Paris to meet his new replacement, still making promises of future plans. 

He will rewrite narratives to suit himself, always portraying himself as a victim. He will manipulate emotions to suit himself, turning his insecurities into another person's flaws. 

Pretending to be something he certainly is not (e.g. an international expat), he will love bomb and then suddenly withdraw, push you away, ensure that you are isolated and left wondering what you have done. Actions and words do not match. 

Never an apology. That would be below him. 

"I am a lone wolf; I don't want to be with another woman". So he said on the eve of going to Paris to meet his new replacement, a gold digging Brazilian called Beatriz Grimaldi in Bologna. 

As if all this was not sufficient, not enough to hurt, he still had the audacity of telling his estranged partner how women in Paris were not as good as women in Finland, how Parisian women were not interested in sleeping with him. Boo hoo.... poor you....

This is not a 14 year old. This is a 60 year old architect who takes pride in hiding his darkness and cruelty to women. This is a man who used, abused and then brutally trashed the woman who had made a home for them - and even bullied and threatened her out of her own home. 

This is Harri Mutka in Tampere in a nutshell - a person who holds grudges out of nothing, who makes his partner feel vulnerable and unworthy, and who will be the most vindictive in order to please his new replacement - currently a Beatriz Grimaldi in Bologna who picked him up on FB and IG. 

Harri Mutka - The Narcissist in Tampere

 

Narcissists have their own particular way of thinking. 

This is an example of a narcissist in Tampere. 

Whenever you ask about the women in his life - of which he has three children from two different women - he will always blame the women for not being good enough for him .

Let's consider:

He wanted the mother of his first child because she came from a happy family. Yet he was not able to give her a lasting happiness. And will still make himself to be the "victim" of a failed relationship. 

He then moved on to another woman with who he had two children - even claiming that he did not want more than one child. He made her life miserable with regular affairs with other women, not giving her the necessary support and in fact, abandoning her needs when she most needed support. It is not wonder that she left him and has a happy life now. 

Until today, she spits out his name, with venom.  

Being addicted to women, Harri Mutka quickly moved on. This time to another woman who demanded that he marry her. And so he did. The woman had two daughters and he supported them all. As soon as they all moved in together, the wife stopped cooking for him and his children - she practically stopped doing anything at all for his children. Harri Mutka was used as an ATM machine on two legs. 

Yet.. why would a woman who was being so well financially supported, go to the bedroom at night with a sharp kitchen knife, ready to stab him? If you ask Harri Mutka, be prepared for his regular explanation - she was mad. 

Another mad woman? Another woman who did not understand him?

Is it possible that a grown up, intelligent man actually collects mad women?

The marriage counsellor they went to was quick to see what kind of man Harri Mutka was - an addict to women. Not only a porn addict, but addicted to having new women all the time. 

This is visible in many ways - pretending to be shy, polite and hesitating, Harri Mutka love bombs his new replacements readily. 

However, it was his last partner that he abused the most - a woman who paid 50% of everything, including for his children. A woman who made the home he never had had, who tool on board his children, his dark badly explained past, a woman who understood that life was not always a straight path. 

It was precisely this woman who Harri Mutka most used, abused and trashed.  Having lied for months and months making her more ill by the day, he finally ended the relationship of years with a text message in the middle of the night - "Yes, I have another woman and am seeing other women" . 

That is how Harri Mutka, almost 60 years old, now ends relationships. Not with a passing girlfriend. but with someone who made a life long commitment. Someone who cared for years for his family, had made a home and owned a home with him. 

Not content with that, he also bullied and threatened her out of her own home. 

Of course, if you ask Harri Mutka, he is a victim. He is misunderstood - and will not say a word about how he has affairs, how his behaviour towards women is erratic, mean and nasty. He will not say a word about how he is very comfortable using and abusing women - only to trash them in the discard phase after he has secured a replacement. 

Beatriz Grimaldi - Ossos de Princesa and Harm to Others

 

Did you really run out of men in Sao Paulo?

Were there not enough men for you in Bologna?

Did you really need to destroy lives in Tampere? For the sake of your ego? for the sake of trips and holidays paid for by Harri Mutka?

Or for the sake of adding to you list of achievements? Ruining lives, living off lies, deceit and harm to others? 

By ruining a family, you stole past, present and future. 

By ruining a family, by grooming a man to throw out the co-owner of their home, you leave everything in a dustbowl of raw bones. You are no princess. You are not above anyone else. 

Yet you have no qualms in behaving as such. As if the world owes you. But it is the men who pay for you - not your honest work. Adultery on social media is cheap. Adultery on social is easy. 

What is not that easy is making a home for others. For caring, for thinking of others. For putting others before yourself. For paying for others. For their comfort and well being. 

For the sake of love?

Love is easy when someone else is paying for you. When there are no dull routines. When you are not taking care of others, but are being paid for. 

Vain, haughty, wilful in using older men to satisfy your need of relevance, that too is not love.

Neither is your photography which is so unoriginal and copies others. 

Female predators are no princesses. 

Female predators like Beatriz Grimaldi leave behind a trail of dusty bones. 

Dusty bones left to rot from the harm she causes. 

The Harm of a Narcissist called Harri Mutka

 

Narcissists have different lives. They live their lives easily in shadows of deceit. Two-faced and appearing to be what most people believe, Harri Mutka is a prime example of a man who is a blank emotional narcissist  who uses and abuses women. 

He will damage women intentionally, without a care. He will hurt deeply and then treat women as if it didn't matter. 

He will accuse a woman for being creative, joyful. He will accuse a woman for being too talented, too full of life and love of life. 

Charming at first, Harri Mutka soon moves into his well known behaviour of gaslighting women and showing total lack of empathy. 

Women need to know this. 

There are different levels of abuse, emotional and mental abuse are also abuse of women.  NPD is no excuse for hurting others. NPD is no excuse to throw women out of their home. NPD is not an excuse to use and abuse women. 

Bullying a woman out of her home is an abuse of basic human rights. 

Sex Addictions - Harri Mutka and Addictions

 

Beatriz Grimaldi, the woman who picking up old married men on FB and Instagram is a game, a thrill so long as the men pay for her trips and holidays. 

A woman who has no problem in destroying the lives of others as long as she gets paid. A woman who will pretend and lie to get what she wants, regardless of the lives she destroys, especially women's lives. A woman who claims to care about homeless women but she herself makes women homeless.

Cold,  calculating, acting with precision to achieve her aims, nothing stops her and her pretence of being "innocent". She knew all the time what she was doing. 

Beatriz Grimaldi is the "artist" in Bologna who is a predator of old men for her own pleasure and gain. Wrapped in lies, there are no limits to what she will do. 

And then there is Harri Mutka. An architect in Tampere, addicted to porn, addicted to using and abusing women. His history of women is nothing short of that. Ask the mother of his children in Tampere. Ask his ex-wife who tried killing him with a long kitchen knife - what were her reasons? How did Harri Mutka drive her to that point? After all, he paid for her and her 2 daughters. 

Yet Harri Mutka plays the game of being "innocent", a "victim" of women. 

Really?

He exploited his ex-partner. He made her ill, abandoned her when she was ill with depression and proceeded in gaslighting her, mentally and emotionally abusing her in every possible way. 

He played his game with ease and sophistication. One day he was pleasant while the next day he would watch as she prepared meals for him that he would not touch. He spoke of the future, taking into account her working schedule, then ignored it all by not returning home. 

He refused to answer calls, even when his daughter who was studying in Stockholm was hospitalised. Harri Mutka is well controlled by Beatriz Grimaldi as long as he continues paying for her trips and holidays. 

People such as these, addicted to harming others, hurting others, exploiting others should be known. 

When the world is burning up with so much pain, individuals such as these have no rights to cause further pain. It is not leaving an older woman for a younger woman - that is a common cliche. It is the abuse that Harri Mutka inflicts on women and then tries to hide. 

Harri Mutka - The Empty Architect in Tampere, Finland

 

This is the image he sent on his way to Paris. 

This is the face he hid, joyful, as he was going to meet up with the woman who had picked him on FB and Instagram. 

This is the man who lied about his trip to Paris. 

He was supposed to spend 3 weeks in Paris, had even promised a trip to Denmark in September, but that was never to be. 

Just as returning, was never to be. 

Harri Mutka did return but only after bullying and threatening his partner of years, out of their home. A home of which she owns 50%. A home which was supposed to be sold, yet isn't. 

Why?

Because Harri Mutka is only interested in a quick sale to cover his debts and to keep paying for his Brazilian pick in Italy. It suits Harri Mutka to have a woman pick him in Italy - this is not new. 

Harri Mutka, in all his cowardness and pride in being a bully, also is known for being cheap. He was always comfortable in accepting generosity from his partner who paid 50% of everything and more - including trips for his children, taking him to beautiful places where he would never have gone himself, buying home items to make the home beautiful and comfortable. She ensured that there was always fresh food, varied and healthy. She ensured that his son always had fresh meals - not microwave food. Not that he ever appreciated any of that. Harri Mutka took it all for granted. 

Pretending to be an "international" photographer/ architect, in Paris he tried picking up French women who refused him (and which he then complained bitterly about to his ex partner) while paying for the Brazilian's holiday and trips to Paris and London. She had him well controlled. 

Harri Mutka, with his mild appearance, was too much of a coward to tell his partner what he was going to do. Pretending until he no longer needed to, a text message sent at 11:45pm was his way of ending a relationship of years. The "advice" which Beatriz Grimaldi gave him was all there. This "has been architect" (so his boss calls him), uses women while it is convenient for him. Hollow, vacant of any emotional intelligence, he made his partner increasingly ill, abusing her mentally and emotionally. 

It even got to the point of physical violence - when he punched her after telling her that he wanted an "open relationship" and she dared to ask if that meant that she too was supposed to have another man. That of course was something Harri Mutka did not accept. It was only him who had the right to have a range of women to play around with. 

It is nothing new when men leave their wives-partners for younger women. However, Harri Mutka did more than that - by forcing his partner out of her own home, he made her leave Finland, a country where she had lived and had made her home. No justification other than his cowardness and bullying tendencies. So that he could have their home available for the Brazilian woman in Italy. 

This is not gender equality. Not in a country such as Finland where women have equal rights. 

Harri Mutka - a man who makes women homeless by obeying the orders of Beatriz Grimaldi. Harri Mutka who makes a woman homeless in the midst of a viral pandemic. A pandemic which he is above and makes fun of. 

Finland is a beautiful, fair country. It is men such as Harri Mutka, with his shady history of using and abusing women until he finds a new woman to use, that need to be known.