Harri Mutka and the Harm of NPD

 "She said I was too feminine and was a homosexual."

"She said she wished I would get a terminal sexual disease."

"She came into the bedroom with a long, sharp knife, ready to stab me. "

These are the tales of Harri Mutka when he speaks of his ex-wife (one of his many partners). 

Harri Mutka, a covert narcissist, plays the victim well. Yet when asked what he does to women, why women react like that to him, he goes silent. Stonewalling all questions into a dead silence. 

People who suffer from NPD struggle with self-esteem and interpersonal relationships. Harri Mutka is a champion in disguising that. He will love bomb the new supply/replacement, feeling temporarily satisfied with his new replacement, happily showing off the new replacement. 

However, NPD is deeply ingrained in him - and his behaviour does not change. With time, his narcissistic traits will show up: lying, gaslighting, dishing out the silent treatment, retreating and denying human affection and communication. Once a woman is of no use to him, he will discard her brutally, as she no longer is considered even as a human being. 

It his last ex partner that he most used, abused and trashed. A woman who shared 50% of  expenses with him, who was honest, hard working and made a home like he never had. Yet it was this person that he was the most brutal to, the most cowardly, not even able to give closure. Because there often is no closure with narcissists. 

Narcissists may keep up the love bombing phase for a while,  remain in a resting period for a while, but their true nature is there. They will constantly have women on the side, constantly lie and blame the other for imagined offences. The other is merely an object for their self validation and nothing more. Narcissists may like the idea of being in love but their "love" is only an infatuation and usually a short term infatuation as they get bored easily and are not able to build long, lasting relationships. 

It's all illusions and facades with a narcissist. Only their lies come in consistent waves; so many lies that Harri Mutka is unable to keep up with his own lies. As a partner, you are only "feed" for a narcissist's self validation and their mask of being a decent human being will slip with time. 

Until the final discard moment which becomes more vicious and nastier with age - or so Harri Mutka has shown. As sure as rain, the moment will come when, faster than a flip of a switch, the partner will be discarded as a non human being, and he will do everything possible to harm, hurt and violate the person who was his partner and had made a home for him and his children.